these are not my people I should never have come here

Sunday, May 23, 2010

little sister

I still refer to you as my, “little sister” in passing conversation,
I have to consciously force myself to say your name instead.

In younger years, you two and I three, we danced in mud puddles together,
Short little munchkins making snow angel movements in the mushy dirt,
Instead of scolding us mom stood back and took photos.

One day, while jumping on mommy and daddy’s bed, I talked you (slash, forced you) into playing, “hair cut”
A day later you were given the infamous 80’s “bowl cut” to even out the spots I missed

In old baby videos the camera would always catch you digging through side-closets, climbing up slides, or laughing with your only 2 teeth while you jumped happily, at the sight of seeing mommy, in your crib

Later in years you loved to play store,
you collected all the empty sugar boxes, milk cartons, and monopoly money to complete your grocery store  inventory
101 Dalmatians was your favorite movie, you’d lay on the floor of the retreat and watch it at least once a day
on other days you put on fashion shows in mommy’s clothes,
always walking out so diva-ish as we cheered you on from mommy’s bed
As a little girl you were the sweetest, you were gentle and full of love.
In every picture your smile so big, that you’d force your chin out towards the camera.

As you say, the three of us grew up slow.
We didn’t care to brush our hair or wear pajamas to bed
We’d protest pushy babysitters, “BUT OUR PARENTS LET US!!”
The summer mom turned off the T.V. (due to our obsession with power rangers, rescue 911, and Fraggel Rock), we built tree forts, put on “Stolen Princess” plays, and saved our nickels and dimes for candy trips to Longs.
We laugh at these memories now, we laugh and call ourselves “little ragamuffins”
But we were happy, we played in the sun until it went down,
we played until our eyes folded over… and then we’d play in our dreams

Somewhere down the road you learned the words, “Fabulous”, “UH UH, not cute” and “Pooch –a-butt
Your style went from Roxy halter tops to Marc Jacobs stilettos
Courtney and I quickly realized that we couldn’t tell you what to do anymore; you stood confidently on your own
I saw this beautiful evolve happen in you
This confidence that I had never seen before

In Santa Barbara we grew to be best friend
Spending our time in the sun drinking rolling rocks or painting in The Dinosaur Park… sprinkled in with some running on the beach in-between
I love those memories; I love to think about us in them

Now in San Francisco you’ve made a life all your own
You should know I’m proud of you.
I see you doing what you love, surrounding yourself with good things and good people, never compromising anything about yourself, only doing what is you.
You are fur, warm robs, dancing in your seat, fruit, costume jewelry, puffy cats, classic Tom Petty, eating cheese-its at bars, shopping in New York –shopping ANYWHERE.

But above all these things, to me, you will always be my little sister. My crazy, believe in the tooth fairy, pig tailed, happy, silly… little sister.
My beautiful, strong, smart, go with the flow, stand up for what you believe in, inspiring, kind, creative… little sister.

Go to Milan, have fun, drink with all the fabulousness, take advantage of every opportunity you can, sleep little, have the time of your life –but please come back soon. I can’t wait to hear all about it.
Happy Happy Graduation, congratulations! Bravo! And well done!

 I love you.

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